Who am I?

Today I was asked to start a blog and define who I am. I never actually knew how hard of a question this really is. So who am I? I am a mother of three, a wife, a daughter, a friend, and I am just me. My life has changed so much over the last few years. Back in 2009 I was diagnosed with an awful chronic illness called Interstitial Cystitis (IC for short). My life changed so much I cold no longer eat what I wanted, I was always in pain, I couldn't run and play with my kids like I used to, and worst of all I lost my job and got booted out of college. 

 I was no longer able to stay in school like a normal person. I was having surgery every 2 months and the school didn't want to work with me anymore I was told "Come back when you are all better." That is pretty hard to do when there is no cure. I also lost my job over needing to many bathroom breaks... and the company sold so it was just easier to lay me off and not call me back. I was a single mom who lost everything at that point. I was very fortunate to have my husband say move in with me (we had just started dating). Things got even harder after that I needed yet another surgery go figure right. I had an Interstim put in and I swear I thought I was going to die! I couldn't do anything I even had to have my mom wash my hair in the sink because I couldn't bend well without pain. I couldn't dress myself at all. This was awful! In the end the Interstim helped a little but not much. So this is my life surgeries, doctors appointments, procedures, and all around just no fun but necessary to live things. 

I have however in all the darkness found a reason for being. I live for my family. They keep me going even when I don't want to. I push myself for them as much as I can. Everyday I strive to be better. Even if I am in so much pain I can't move I force a smile and be there for my family. In the end that is what they will remember right? They will know mom was strong, brave, and a fighter. IC may not kill in most cases but it is crippling and very life altering especially when doctors don't like to treat pain. I am only 28 so doctors really hate giving pain care. I get it I really do but most of the time I wish I could function like a normal person and have real pain care so I could really live again. 

Today I was told I am an inspiration and honestly I didn't understand till she said I was so strong and so brave. This one word changed my entire day from awfully painful and sad to push on and smile. To this person you have no idea how much you helped me today and I love you.

I will try to continue this blog and write about what ever I feel like. This will not be just about health but about life... My life. 

Thanks for reading.